BREAKING NEWS

I just made a major discovery. Biig discovery. I discovered another place of Matubo you can eat with less than 50 bob. Kwanza tu hell with Matubo now. In that place, menu includes 3 sizable bones (the ones removed all meats) and soul fills plate until it pours out. Na bei ni fashirire... !!! aki ya nani. kwa Mama Otis tumehama... Even supu of saucer is being added without being looked bad.

And as I was chewing the bones near Muthurwa, I remembered an event that happened about 20 years ago when someone mentioned that KCPE started today.

I was in class 8 and we dided mock exam in preparation for KCPE.

I happened to have tied top marks in Science and Agriculture with a boy named Koskei.  He was born Kipkoskei but when his  tree was peeled, he removed Kip and remained Koskei. They used to say that Kip means Kipii, so once you shedded part of your tree, it was mandatory to shed Kip too.

Our science and Agriculture teacher, a Mr. Birgen refused to know something. Where i failed, Koskei failed, where i gotted right he gotted right. from Question one to 60th question.

This Koskei boy was blessed with one thing. Repeating every class he entered. He repeated every class, not skipping even one without repeating that class. Education was entering through one ear and removing through the other ear as fast as it entered.

Mr. Birgen called us both and saided we be clapped for scoring 86%. Everyone in class felled under the table because they knewed someone had copy pasted from the other and it wasnt me. Mr. Birgen then instructed all pupils to laugh at Koskei for stealing exams from the leader of science and Agri.

During the exam, Koskei used to finish first.. withing the first 10 minutes. All he used to do was to guess the choices and tick for all questions, without reading any of them at all. He would then lift his hand and say,

"Esgus me disha, galeiiiii, egzam momite " (Escuse me teacher, atiriri, my exam is finished ").

Mr. Birgen would reply "Galeiii Kosgei, Momite all na ndagika agenge? (Atiriri Kokeskia, you have completed within one minute?

When we did KCPE, he scored 130 out of a possible 700. No secondary school could accept him then. His father used to own three tractors and saided because education was not entering him well well, he becomes a driver of one.

By the time we finished form 4, Koskei owned one old tractor.

After high school, I came to Nairobi to further my education.

I wented and did Ms. Word majoring in Gynecology of true. Before I finished Gynoring, he had over 7 tractors of John Deere and two combine harvesters.

A few months ago, I wented to Rumuruti and got stuck in the mad near Baragoi. Small, a guy with tractor was passing. It was Koskei. He pulled me until Rumuturi where Rami starts.

I asked how much he will charge and telled me he cant charge me because I used to show him mathematics when we were reading class 8.

After we parted, I was telled that Koskei now owns over 200 acres of ngano land in Narok, owns a few houses of stairs here and there and over 15 tractors.Now, a faster one and you need to hear this.  Koskei has 3PMs and manages them well like nothing. While here it is impossible to manage even one, he does it effortlessly yet no education used to enter him.

Now, if I go to Rumuruti or Kinamba or Sipiri near Baragoi and meet him, I bend small when greeting him because of respect of him making alot of money and he does not do himself. I actually dont talk much because it is sin to talk too much infront of a person who has more money that you. And still drives one tractor and ploughs with it like an employee. And he has not even a small stomach. Not like us who when we smell money from far, stomach starts protruding until you cant differentiate us from pregnant persons.

As I was eating meatless bones this afternoon near Muthurwa, I remembered Koskei. Head telled me that if he sawed me eating ugali with bones, instead of real meat or Shikens, he would repay himself by laughing until all his ribs break apart because we laughed at him 20 years ago for copying a simple science and Agri mock. Head was telling me that while am swinging bells in River road at my clinic treating difficult persons who cant pay without bargaining, infact some wants to pay in Kind, Koskei is buying another tractor of John Deere. Infact if the CEO of CMC hears that Koskei is at the showroom, they will abandon all their duties and go to attend to him personally.

So, what am I trying to say? Instead of swinging bells there, you can become a Koskei in your own right. If education was not entering you, stop pushing yourself where you dont belong. Look inside you and do what education cant; Making more money than those of us who thomed small..

Cheers!!

I am

Dagitari Onjohi
Snr. Gyno & Former Classmate of Koskei.