The Remover in Persons

I once wrote this story.. http://www.wanjohidaily.blogspot.com/2011/05/fly-women-rule-our-world.html

But I am now realising that some rare intelligent species of men like me grow brains with age.

On Friday, I inserted in one of the chemists at Corner house. Infront of me, was a small persons, below the recommended keeping age" (i.e 25yrs).

She ordered for 92. P2, for the sake of those who comes from Ng'arua and Dodoli of Head, P2 is special medicine THAT persons swallow when they get climbed bila makobosto. In a fairer word, it is medicine that is used to remove stomach legally and without feeling guilty..

I moved to her and initiated a conversation. In my capacity as a senior gyno, I also offer counseling services to people with no good head.

She gave me her number and I promised to buy her lunch where I eat everyday, i.e. Kosewe following day. But in the other side of my brain, I also saw an opportunity to drink beer from several of my friends, including Theuri, Akuku or Mpesa in exchange of beer at Tribeka.

On sato, at exactly 9.21 AM my phone was ringing with no end. It was that persons. She asked me if I was game for lunch and replied that I was, like satan.

By 3, Martin refused to be introduced and so, all others I could supply persons to in exchange of beer and meat of burnt, so I did not remove myself.

Jana, the persons started again, calling until 12.30 until I gave up and decided to call her to our other office in Nairobi of up, not Rifarori.

She came within a few seconds and sat herself at the reception. Just when I was about to remove, my boss called me and gave me some work.

Seeing that the persons had waited for an hour, and since I had salary, I went and gave her 5sock and telled her to go eat lunch, we talk another day when I had time.

Before 6 reached, she called again and telled , although in very many words, I sum it up
"Sweerie, my phone has destroyed earpiece and fudi has telled me that it is software and it is 4k. Please send me 4 k I repair"

Instead of laughing, I wanted to cry in anger. This persons barely knewed me for a day and was asking me for 4k from me? And of all the people? Meen! I refused how she carried me and what impression she got when I gave her 5sock for lunch.

I called theuri and showed him the sms from her. He telled me "tushangiri twacanukire muno thiku ici. tutiraragira. Konire uhana mbeca. Weda miti iri, to rimue ndukoragwo mutwe" (This days, tujangiris became more clever,. they cannot sleep hungry. you can send her 2k, because sometimes you dont have head"

I decided to measure her devil. I telled her I know a good and fair fudi, she shud take to, then I be billed.

She replied.. 'No, I want to take to my fudi myself. Most fudis are fake and thiefs'

I telled her to wait I will call her after a meeting.

When she called, I telled her to wait until my check matured next week, I will buy her a new phone. In head, I refused to know.

Today. at noon, she called again and said

"Baby, imagine we have not been paid, and my rent is due today, 5th. please send me 10k I will refund when we get paid'

I hit myself two hard slaps for having picked her first call when she called. But to dismiss her, advised her to talk to the agent to wait until when they receive pay.

She said their agent is very bad, cannot listed. I telled her for now, I cant.

Now, right now, at exactly.. lemi check phone record... 16.55 She called again..

'Baby, imagine I have decided to leave that work. I cant work with such stress. We dont get paid in time, they pa us peanuts. Now, si u send me something for upkeep, to enable me find another job'

I telled her to cut phone, I will call her. I then went to latrine, removed trouser and hit my nyees so hard 5 times for having someone like that call me'

Bending because of pain of hitting mself so hard, I wrote an sms

'Bish, you know wat, I am sending you no money. All persons in Nairobi knows me. they knows me as a man that does not remove money just like that. Not because I dont have, but because I grow brains everyday. Please dont call or sms this number again, because I have sold it. bish!"

Now, there is something I have refused to know. Why are persons like that? Although this one is excess, too excess coz she is an easlander, why would a persons borrow money from a stranger with such vigor? I have met many but this one is on her own class. In my village, if a persons borrow you money and she is not known very well to you, you refuse to know and forget her completely. the only persons who should DEMAND money from you on first encounter is a trapper. The rest, it should either come from me without asking or when I have drinked too many KCs.

I remain,

Dagitari Wamagogo
Snr. Gyno & Refuser of to Know.